Sir, would you like my lunch?

Science knows practicing gratitude changes neuropathways that govern my emotions and memory. But I do not seek approval from academia or applause from the masses.

I practice gratitude to reciprocate to pay it forward for those times I stood tall, suffered consequences and others stepped in to help.

My thoughts, words, actions may help someone, as others once helped me.

Sometimes I forget to practice, especially during tough times.

It had been a difficult six months.

Yesterday as I left work, in a rush to get to my next (oh so important) activity, an older gentleman stumbled past. He was extremely thin, unkempt, and obviously an arm amputee. For November he was underdressed. I wondered when he had last eaten.

Suddenly, my agenda seemed unimportant.

I picked up my uneaten lunch and hurried after the gentleman.

Our office had preached that it was unsafe to approach street people. The man was in need, and I felt called to help.

“Sir. Excuse me sir. Would you like my lunch?” 

It took him a moment to realize I was talking to him. How many times had he been treated as if he were invisible?

He took a deep draw on his cigarette, looked at me, and shook his head, “No.”

“But sir it’s hamburger and fresh carrots.” A

gain, he shook his head, “No.”

Not knowing what to do next, I let him wander on his way.

Later I chastised myself for not doing more. I could have walked with him to the closest coffee shop and bought him a hot drink.

Gratitude practice is called a practice because it requires conscious effort, repetition and trial and error.

Next time, I will offer a hot drink.

While I do not want to repeat my tough times, or minimize them, (nor do any of us), I am grateful I can stand tall and hear when compassion calls.

I am grateful to have agency.

I’m sure there was a time that gentleman had agency and knew how to stand tall in the face of life’s troubles. But on that day, he did not.

“Agency” is the capacity to make sound choices and act independently to shape your own life. Having agency means you are an effective agent for yourself and can advocate for your needs and make decisions that align with your values.

Learn to discern when compassion calls.